Responses Requested: Negative Dance Learning Experiences

I am currently doing research for an article on the use of comments directed toward one's body and/or sexuality by dance instructors. I would like to hear your experiences - positive, negative or neutral - related to this topic. Has an instructor used inappropriate language or metaphors regarding your body and/or your sexuality? Have you heard dance instructors give comments - either overt or subtle - that you feel are outside the bounds of what is respectful when it comes to addressing how a person moves his or her body? If so, please email me with your experience. Names will be changed for the purpose of the article, and the goal is to educate dance instructors about how to use language that is positive and appropriate when it comes to something as personal and even intimate as partner dance.

If you feel comfortable, you can certainly share your experiences in this thread. But if not, please feel free to send me a PM (private message). This article is expected to be published on the Joy in Motion website late this fall.

Thank you!

hi karin,

most certainly.. as a dance enthusiast let me share with you my personal experience on this..

i have attended lessons but over a hundred instructors, both local and international..
Many teachers here have too many ego problems with others and there is too much infighting and hence dont visit or want to learn from other teachers.

i want to recount my experience with one local ballroom teacher i visited in the early part of my teaching days..

This particular teacher would physically hit the students on the feet if they got something wrong.. yes physically hit. i got whacked a couple of tiimes too .. i felt that no matter what happens, a physically violent boundary is intolerable.

i once retorted back saying "if u hit me once more i will turn u over on my lap and spank you".. i think that pissed him off a bit .. he was rude through the rest of the course but never touched me again.

Another salsa teacher once said about me "he is too fat. how come if he claims to be a dance teacher he is not fit."..this was said in order to gain mileage over me.. well the fact is that i am fat but i think that is crossing a line cause i dont think fat or lean, tall or short has anything related to dancing. you really actually dance with the soul and not the body anyways.

you neednt change my name. you can put it down as it coming from me, but i would like to keep a sort of professional respect for the teachers by not naming them.

anand

It's unfortunate that dancing often becomes a game for celebrity instead of a vehicle for expressing the soul. Instructors are in a unique position to encourage or discourage this attitude among their students. When an instructor focuses on the true goal of learning - self-expression, creativity, connection, communication, culture - instead of appearances and attention, they really do such a service to the world of dance. And the rest... well, they're pretty much just teaching glorified exercise and modeling.

Thanks for sharing, Anand!

Hey All,

Let me share you my exp. Might be it's out of topic, but though useful.

I am a newbie over here...and I joined beg. batch....The problem I was having is not with the instr. but with my partner.....yeah..actually she is too young in this and don't know what exactly her prb is but she is feeling much shy wid every1 in our class and so dancing far away from the parterns..lolz

One more problems wid her is...Self Leading......I got really fed up wid a girl will self lead her self.....

Anywayz...I talked abt this prb to my instr...and she really gave me a very good solution for how to go about it....and now I am very much comftable wid this......Happy to having such a nice Instrs....!!

Thanks